…I miss the days when I used to come to my blog freely and
just write whatever came to mind. These days I feel
more self-conscious: paranoia assumes a viewer.
God knows why, for the chances of people actually reading what I write in this miasma of
information that surrounds us is very low, random, and in the end, quite meaningless (though once upon a time, it actually got read with consequences)
Assuming a viewer can sometimes be a good thing. I do think it can help
one grow as an artist; but it can also act as a barrier to work. What’s all that bullshit (though not such bullshit) Lacan said about the
toddler facing himself in the mirror and “realizing” that his ego is formed by “others”
(or some such thing), leading to all kinds of neurosis? In theory: part and parcel of growing up…old(er).
Sometimes I get blocked in the studio for the same reason I stopped blogging as often as I used to. Time to bust up the mirror. As that despicable man and sometimes great artist (Picasso) said, “Every child is an artist. The problem is
how to remain an artist once we grow up."
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